Gender Defender

I Charlie Victory Whitham am a hypocrite! I blab on about how we shouldn’t let our gender be defined by our sex and I go on about how people should be exactly who they want to be but when it came down to it…I didn’t do the right thing.

Recently during a rugby training session a fellow player and friend was injured and I accompanied her to hospital. Whilst waiting to go into A&E, a woman next to us said “Oh dear, now tell your boyfriend that playing rugby leads to injuries.” I just stood there and smiled like an awkward idiot, hoping she’d go away.
“So how did he do it?”
I said, “We, we were at training.” I thought I emphasized that the lady was wrong by saying we.

Who was wrong?

I was. I was trying to spare an old lady from being embarrassed for thinking my friend was a he instead of thinking how my friend felt. Even now I haven’t asked if she felt uncomfortable on that day. So she has short hair and plays rugby and I let a total stranger make an ignorant blunder that could have hurt her feelings. I should have been more concerned with her than an old woman who has archaic ideas of gender based on very small things such as the sport we play and the way we dress. Our gender is our own construction and not saying that my friend needed me to batter an old woman in a hospital but I should have been more concerned with her feelings.

So to my friend, if you ever read this please know that I am sorry and I hope you don’t think less of me. And if you ever read this blog and think I am a total arse for writing it then please give me a shovel to dig myself a bigger hole.

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